Published work

Featured Articles

Explore a featured selection of my writing work below.

Clara Amfo: ‘I could be a lot more bait if I wanted to’

‘I have a calamitous image of falling onto her horns,’ says Clara Amfo, as Gerty the goat – a black and white beast with big curly antlers – trots about behind her. ‘Let me not manifest that!’ 
We’re on Freightliners City Farm in Islington. It’s a sunny(ish) Wednesday afternoon in May and the easy-going presenter is donning a burgundy three-piece shorts suit by Labrum while clomping about in big brown and white cowboy boots. ‘In the summer of Cowboy Carter it feels good to wear cowboy boots,’ A...

Want a 24-hour-city? Superclubs aren’t the answer

You’ve all heard of Drumsheds, London’s new 15,000-capacity venue that’s been set up in the old Ikea in Tottenham. Cavernous in size, with an entire area dedicated to food vendors, the world’s most efficient toilet queuing system and airport-like security, it’s taken going out in London to the next (very grown-up) level. In a similar vein to Manchester’s Warehouse Project, tickets start at £27.50 and must be booked in advance; line-ups are revealed as ‘seasons’ which are more akin to London Fash...

In the studio with London’s hottest fashion designers

When you think of London fashion, you’ll probably think of Nova check, Kate Moss and Princess Diana’s revenge dress. You might think of Naomi Campbell taking a tumble on the catwalk and Vivienne Westwood’s iconic ‘DESTROY’ shirt. But your mind might also go elsewhere, far from studios and runways and photoshoots. To the smoking areas of nightclubs, to moshpits, to drag queens with extra-long acrylic nails and to the girl popping to the offy in an Adidas tracksuit and Ugg boots. 
The point is, w...

How ketamine became Britain’s go-to party drug

When, and why, did the country go mad for K? And is it *really* killing the dance floor?

‘It always strikes you when you’re not expecting it,’ says Oliver*, 23. ‘ Your vision shifts and you start seeing these geometric shapes. Or you can feel like you’re in this giant chamber, with weird sounds and reddish, purple neon lights.’

Oliver is talking about experiencing a K-hole: taking too much ketamine and going into a dissociative, hallucinatory state. Regulars on the club scene might be familiar

Stripteases, projectile vomiting and ambulances: has brunch gone too far?

‘You’re looking like a real New Yorker now,’ the chipper waiter tells my friend, giving her a knowing nod as he pours her fourth mimosa of the day. It’s barely past midday, but we’re glassy-eyed and swaying in our seats at a new restaurant-slash-bar-slash-club in north London, Destiny’s Child pounding in the background. And yes, we’re drunk.

It’s a scene we all know well. You’ve just sunk as many bloody marys you can humanly fit in your stomach, stumbling out onto the street at 2pm. The afterno

How Cornwall went to war with Greggs (again)

A woman in a white cap and floury black apron is looking at me with disapproval. ‘No comment,’ she says firmly, when I ask her about the new Greggs that’s opened in Truro. A customer waiting for her order inhales sharply when she overhears my question. ‘We don’t want to be involved in anything political,’ the woman behind the counter adds.

She is a pasty-maker at one of Cornwall’s many independent bakeries: a not-all-that-uncommon profession in this part of the world. So when did opening a plac

Features

These photos capture the nostalgic world of London’s niche gaming venues

Where do you go in London if you’re really into gaming? From Soho’s Las Vegas arcade, to an underground Japanese games centre in Manor House and an E-sports bar on Cally Road, the capital has a whole world of venues for games buffs that might not be obvious to the unknowing passer-by. But for those savvy to the scene, the Big Smoke’s gaming shops and arcades can be a gateway into a vibrant and tight-knit community.
Whether they’re sweating it out on the Dance Dance Revolution machine, or battli...

‘Drag’s violent sibling’: Meet queer wrestling collective Fist Club

‘Are you greased up?’ asks drag king Rich Tea, who is slipping into a pink and black unitard with ‘Little Dick’ printed on the backside. Cassius The Neon Explosion, the self-certified ‘bad twink’ of wrestling, is slathering himself in baby oil by the ring. He’s wearing bum-cheek bearing yellow hotpants adorned with daisies, and matching yellow and mint green ruffled leg warmers.
Meanwhile, Liv Laugh Love, an evil Starbucks-slurping Karen, wearing UGG boots and a cringey slogan sweatshirt, is tr...

How ketamine became Britain’s go-to party drug

When, and why, did the country go mad for K? And is it *really* killing the dance floor?

‘It always strikes you when you’re not expecting it,’ says Oliver*, 23. ‘ Your vision shifts and you start seeing these geometric shapes. Or you can feel like you’re in this giant chamber, with weird sounds and reddish, purple neon lights.’

Oliver is talking about experiencing a K-hole: taking too much ketamine and going into a dissociative, hallucinatory state. Regulars on the club scene might be familiar

Queer London DJs curate your ultimate Pride playlist

London Pride is finally here! And what do the LGBTQ+ community do best? A night out on the tiles, of course. London has literally tonnes of incredible queer clubs and club nights, and let’s not forget that dance music genres like House, Disco and Acid House originated from the LGBTQ+ scene. So we asked five of London’s best queer DJs to recommend some absolute essential bangers for an epic Pride night out in the capital. Grab the speaker, pour yourself a G&T and whack these on before heading out

Stripteases, projectile vomiting and ambulances: has brunch gone too far?

‘You’re looking like a real New Yorker now,’ the chipper waiter tells my friend, giving her a knowing nod as he pours her fourth mimosa of the day. It’s barely past midday, but we’re glassy-eyed and swaying in our seats at a new restaurant-slash-bar-slash-club in north London, Destiny’s Child pounding in the background. And yes, we’re drunk.

It’s a scene we all know well. You’ve just sunk as many bloody marys you can humanly fit in your stomach, stumbling out onto the street at 2pm. The afterno

King Charles who? Meet the alternative kings of London

In case you hadn't heard, Britain is getting a new monarch. But we've had enough of old sausage fingers for the time being, frankly. So we sat down with London’s royalty, who rule over the realms of theatre, drag, music and... Peckham. These kings of the capital are dripping in charisma, smarts and pzazz. Charlie boy better watch his back, lest they supplant him from the throne. Long live the alternative King(s)!

‘My grandfather was the pearly king of Mile End and his father was the Coster King

The story of The Black Sheep Bar in Croydon: an unlikely spiritual home of dubstep

Put on your best bass face and point your gun fingers: this is the story of dubstep in CR0

Picture the scene: a dingy nightclub in Zone 5 that you’ve queued for two hours to get in to. In the booth, a snapback-sporting DJ blasting out wobbly basslines that are so powerful you can feel your face vibrating. The air is thick with sweat and your £2.10 pint of Carlsberg is warm in your hand. The year is 2010. This is Croydon, this is The Black Sheep Bar and this is the heyday of dubstep.

We know, w

How Cornwall went to war with Greggs (again)

A woman in a white cap and floury black apron is looking at me with disapproval. ‘No comment,’ she says firmly, when I ask her about the new Greggs that’s opened in Truro. A customer waiting for her order inhales sharply when she overhears my question. ‘We don’t want to be involved in anything political,’ the woman behind the counter adds.

She is a pasty-maker at one of Cornwall’s many independent bakeries: a not-all-that-uncommon profession in this part of the world. So when did opening a plac

Will Elf Bars die in 2023?

2022 had us all riding the vapour wave, but are colourful E-cigs going to stick around into the new year?

Unless you’re still stubbornly self-isolating, chances are you’ve noticed that the UK’s been taken over by colourful sticks emanating puffs of sweet-smelling vapour. Originating from China, the most popular brand of disposable vapes, Elf Bar, comes in flavours like Cotton Candy, Blue Razz Lemonade and Peach Ice, and by the summer of 2022, these rainbow sticks of fruity-flavoured smoke had t

Reviews

Who’s Holiday! review: Miz Cracker stars in this naughty festive take on Doctor Seuss

If you’ve always wondered what happed to little Cindy Lou Who after the Grinch stole Christmas, this is the show for you. But be warned: this isn’t the sugary sweet Who of the book; she’s all grown up now, and she’s a Xanax-popping, bong-huffing, slut-dropping ex-convict.

In ‘Who’s Holiday!’, US playwright Matthew Lombardo gives the story of the Grinch a full drag glow-up. It’s a one-woman show, starring ‘Drag Race’ veteran Miz Cracker and directed by Kirk Jameson. As with ‘Wicked’, it’s a chan

Rotorious review

Decent chips and gravy are something you can rarely get in London. Northerners who’ve migrated south often bemoan the capital’s serious lack of the good sauce to slather on your spuds, which is typically confined to northern chippies or KFC. Although chips and gravy aren’t the main item on the menu at Rotorious, it's certainly worth going there to scoff them.

Heading up Rotorious, the new audaciously named rotisserie chicken joint at Market Stalls in Peckham, are brothers Adam and Sam Reid, nei

Caia | Restaurants in Ladbroke Grove, London

Caia is a tale of two venues. The upstairs room of this new Notting Hill restaurant and wine bar gives off an air of sophistication, with chic bar stools to perch on and floor-to-ceiling bottles. But there’s a clear vibe shift when you walk downstairs to the basement. Suddenly you’re at a ’70s house party, with kitschy-cool velvet seating, chandeliers and even a disco ball. And here’s the kicker: on the far wall is a massive vintage record stand, bedecked with retro vinyl and three turntables. T

Hackney Coterie brings new flavours to the heart of East London

Hidden away under the railway arches by Hackney Downs station, this unassuming spot is home to a vibrant new restaurant.

Calling itself a modern brasserie, the restaurant and wine bar is not defined by one cuisine, although hints of modern British and Asian run throughout. Hackney Coterie is founded by two friends, Anthony Lyon running front of house and sommelier Kelvin McCabe.

With exposed brick, hanging plants and colourful Basquiat-esque art, we’re definitely in East London. A giant pop-ar

News

Printworks might stay open as a clubbing venue

There could be a significant reprieve for the south London club following huge public outrage at its closure

The beloved venue Printworks will live to fight another day, as plans to shut down the south London nightlife institution for good might be shelved due to a massive public backlash.

that Printworks would be closing to be developed into offices in July this year. The huge industrial venue is in the middle of British Land’s redevelopment of Canada Water, and plans were approved to transfo

A statue of the Queen may be put on the Fourth Plinth

The Trafalgar Square spot has become famous for hosting some challenging contemporary art

To commemorate the Queen after her death, it has been suggested that a statue of our longest-reigning monarch could occupy a permanent position on Trafalgar Square’s Fourth Plinth.

The idea has been spinning around London’s rumour mill for years, with former London Mayor Ken Livingstone first mentioning the statue of Her Majesty back in 2013. The proposed sculpture will show Queen Elizabeth II on horsebac

London Underground has banned busking until after the Queen's funeral and people aren't happy

If your commute is usually backed by the sound of singer-songwriters strumming their guitars, you can expect to trudge through the tunnels of London Underground in silence for the next week. In light of the Queen’s death on Thursday (September 8), TfL has decided to ban busking on the underground until after her funeral. However many musicians are concerned about what this means for their income.

This comes as part of a that has seen everything including football, community events and club nigh

A corner shop opposite Battersea Power Station is selling £3,000 wine

Among the essentials you usually pick up from the local cornershop like toothpaste, pints of milk and late-night Tiskies, you wouldn’t expect to see truffle and caviar. But for the bougie of residents in SW11, this is apparently completely normal, as the cornershop in the new Battersea Power Station complex is selling some extremely extravagant items, including a bottle of 2007 Petrus for a cool £3,000.

Nestled inside a padlocked and temperature-controlled ‘Fine Wines’ cabinet, the red is one o

Why Stoke Newington flooded so badly yesterday

Yesterday, after a week of immense heat, Stoke Newington saw some unreal scenes after torrential rainfall caused flash flooding. Chaos ensued as water gushed on to roads, pavements and parks, flooding local shops, pubs and homes.

Yesterday the Met Office put out an amber weather warning across London and parts of south-east England, meaning that there could be a threat to life. It warned there were likely to be floods, power cuts and travel disruptions.

Amber Middleton is a manager at The Thre

This beautiful London café has been forced to close after 60 years

Islington’s Alpino Cafe is leaving its home because of what it calls its ‘greedy’ landlord

The latest casualty of gentrification and London’s spiralling rents comes in the form of a beloved Islington greasy spoon, Alpino Cafe, which is having to move, its owner citing a ‘greedy’ landlord.

The family-run Italian-English joint on Chapel Market opened in 1959, and ever since has supplied the area with hearty fry-ups, plates of pasta, kippers and chicken escalopes that are synonymous with the Angl

The team behind Printworks are opening a new club in east London

They’ve just announced the line-ups for the first nights

With the news last week that Printworks will be closing down and be turned into offices, Londoners were devastated to see another beloved electronic music venue bite the dust. Luckily we haven’t retired our Air Maxes just yet, because the people behind the Surrey Quays music mecca are opening a brand new club in east London.

A collaboration between Broadwick Live (Printworks, Tobacco Docks) and LWE (Junction 2), The Beams will be based i

An anticolonial statue will occupy the Fourth Plinth

Trafalgar Square’s Fourth Plinth is getting a new occupant, and this time they’re giving the old white dudes a rest, as the statue will celebrate John Chilembwe, an anticolonial hero and baptist who was killed in an uprising in

Samson Kambalu, a Malawian artist and associate professor of fine art at Oxford, has created the sculpture, called ‘Antelope’. It will be unveiled in September and is the fourteenth contemporary artwork to be commissioned for display in the historic location.

‘Antelope’

Canary Wharf has launched a new open air swimming venue

Wave to the bankers as you perfect your butterfly

Attention all you wild swimmers and water nymphs, because London’s got a brand new outdoor swimming venue. It’s found in the very wild natural beauty area of Canary Wharf.

Jokes aside, this new spot seems pretty swanky and the epitome of urban swimming. Against the backdrop of One Canada Square and Newfoundland tower block, Middle Dock, a 220-year-old former dock, is now open for seven days a week until the end of September.

You can launch you

Asda has started security tagging butter

The cost of living crisis has come for dairy, as shoppers this week were dismayed to find Lurpak’s spreadable butter is being hawked in some supermarkets for an insane £9.

The butter is now so outrageously expensive that Asda has security tagged it. And it’s not just butter, as Aldi and Co-op have also been spotted tagging blocks of cheddar and packs of lamb chops.

In Iceland, it’s currently £9.35 for 1kg of Lurpak, while in Tesco it’s £8.98. The cheapest pack of Lurpak was found at Co-op wher

Listicles

The funniest reactions to the London heatwave so far

London is in meltdown, literally. In this country we’re not really equipped for any kind of extreme weather. Tarmac is bubbling, trains are cancelled and the Queen’s Guards are still wearing their furry hats and wool jackets. In 40C heat, with air con, our city’s been thrown into utter chaos.

Despite the weather giving us all a feeling of impending doom, we wouldn’t be Brits if we didn’t approach the frankly terrifying heatwave with our signature sarcasm and deadpan wit. On Twitter, every man,

20 things London still does better than anywhere else

Tins and tings. Here’s all the stuff we are greater at than every other city in the world

We’ve got over 3,000 public green spaces in London, and if there’s one thing they’re good for, it’s cracking open a few cans and gorging on ‘picky bits’ with your mates. During lockdown in 2020, Londoners were so desperate for a knees-up that park boozing got alcohol temporarily banned from London Fields. A proud boast, indeed.

The voyage to a day festival in London is an epic pilgrimage. Hundreds of buck

10 great ways to take part in London Craft Week 2022

London Craft Week is back this week, with makers and creatives across the city celebrating all things crafty from Monday May 9 to Sunday May 15. If you want to discover a hidden talent or learn from experts in their field, there are loads of workshops, exhibitions and talks to choose from. Whether it’s spectacle-making, wine-tasting or knitting, we’ve rounded up our top picks for you to help you have a really fun crafternoon.

Make your own spectacles with Cubitts

Make the kind of glasses that

Ten brilliant looks from Harry Styles

Often hailed as one of the most fashionable men on the planet, it seems that Harry Styles’s fashion knows no limits.

Fabulously flamboyant and not afraid to play by his own rules, Harry Styles has secured himself a place in the highest echelons of fashion.

Styles is Gucci’s darling, has hosted the Met Gala, and was the first man to appear solo on the cover of American Vogue.

As the singer gears up to release his highly anticipated third album Harry's House, Square Mile looks back on his best

The best pubs in Camden

Ah Camden – a mecca for rock music, markets and late-night revelry. And tourists. Lots of tourists.

But don’t be put off by the crowds as Camden serves up some of the best pubs that London has to offer.

There’s vast diversity of choice – whatever your drinking needs, Camden will have the pub for you. These are boozers once frequented by the likes of Amy Winehouse, Oasis and even Charles Dickens.

For the best beer gardens, Sunday roasts and musician haunts, we've selected our favourite pubs in

The best cocktail bars in Soho

If there’s one thing Soho isn’t lacking, it’s cocktail bars. But how to choose the best ones?

Our comprehensive list helps you avoid tourist traps serving watered-down Cosmos, and leads you straight to the best cocktails bars in Soho.

As you stumble out onto Dean Street in the wee hours of the morning, you’ll have ingested some of the finest cocktails that Soho has to offer – and maybe even have room for a nightcap.

Whether you’re looking to sip Cantonese spirits in Chinatown, taste London’s

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